Warning: spoilers ahead.
Read this review on GoodReads here.
I didn't know I dreaded re-reading this book until I read the first word. In fact, when I saw the book on the curriculum for my English Literature course I was very happy to have a good excuse to read this beautiful book again. When I turned to the first page, I was excited.
While reading, however, I realized maybe I shouldn't have been quite as excited. I realized a lot had changed in the three years since I last read it. I remember feeling happy after I first read the book. Not only did it have a beautiful form with all those illustrations, but it also had a beautiful message. Then, the book felt like a story, nothing more than that.
But in the meantime, before reading it the second time, I've had to let go, just like Conor. Well, maybe not JUST like Conor; I didn't have to let my mom go, but still, I had to let go. And, as you will learn while reading the book, letting go is not easy. Not easy at all. So now, having just finished the book, I feel sad. Sad for what I've had to let go, sad for what I will need to let go in the future, sad because I knew how Conor must have felt.
"The answer is that it does not matter what you think, the monster said, because your mind will contradict itself a hundred times each day. You wanted her to go at the same time you were desperate for me to save her. Your mind will believe comforting lies while also knowing the painful truths that make those lies necessary. And your mind will punish yourself for believing both."
This passage struck me as being especially true, at least for me, and it hurt. Reading that hurt, because it felt like the first time I had to admit the painful truths to myself all over again. It brought all those feelings back again. But that's alright. It happened and it sucks that it happened, but I can't change it. And maybe that's why I still love this book so much. It forces you to accept that letting go hurts, but that it is necessary, and that it is okay to be hurt.
"Conor held tightly onto his mother.
And by doing so, he could finally let her go."
Read this review on GoodReads here.
I didn't know I dreaded re-reading this book until I read the first word. In fact, when I saw the book on the curriculum for my English Literature course I was very happy to have a good excuse to read this beautiful book again. When I turned to the first page, I was excited.
While reading, however, I realized maybe I shouldn't have been quite as excited. I realized a lot had changed in the three years since I last read it. I remember feeling happy after I first read the book. Not only did it have a beautiful form with all those illustrations, but it also had a beautiful message. Then, the book felt like a story, nothing more than that.
But in the meantime, before reading it the second time, I've had to let go, just like Conor. Well, maybe not JUST like Conor; I didn't have to let my mom go, but still, I had to let go. And, as you will learn while reading the book, letting go is not easy. Not easy at all. So now, having just finished the book, I feel sad. Sad for what I've had to let go, sad for what I will need to let go in the future, sad because I knew how Conor must have felt.
"The answer is that it does not matter what you think, the monster said, because your mind will contradict itself a hundred times each day. You wanted her to go at the same time you were desperate for me to save her. Your mind will believe comforting lies while also knowing the painful truths that make those lies necessary. And your mind will punish yourself for believing both."
This passage struck me as being especially true, at least for me, and it hurt. Reading that hurt, because it felt like the first time I had to admit the painful truths to myself all over again. It brought all those feelings back again. But that's alright. It happened and it sucks that it happened, but I can't change it. And maybe that's why I still love this book so much. It forces you to accept that letting go hurts, but that it is necessary, and that it is okay to be hurt.
"Conor held tightly onto his mother.
And by doing so, he could finally let her go."
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